Everything happens for a reason...

I know this statement is cliche as they come but I firmly believe it. I believe we make choices from considering pros and cons of a situation and knowing that we can live or live without certain outcomes. A few days ago, I decided to let something go because I was killing myself to make it work. I was stressing to the max about all the possibilities the future could hold and I couldn't deal with it. I'm sitting here four days later, and that something is right back in my life and I couldn't be happier. For the most part, everything has been resolved and I can go through my daily life comforted by the fact that one segment of my life is working out the way I want it to right now.

The past few days have just confirmed in me that no matter what you think, there is always a reason you make the decisions you make. You won't always see the results and quickly as I did, and i'm not 100% sure the results are finished but I do know that i'm happy with where they are now.

I haven't been on here in about a month and things have changed considerably. I have seen most of my friends graduate (a few are left behind, but i envy them for not having to deal with the current job market) and I have come upon some new job opportunities of my own. I hope that the one I am currently pursuing works out and I can stop this foolishness of not having insurance or other benefits.

This year is going to be a great one, I can feel it. I'll get a job when it's meant for me.. I'll be in Knoxville a lot this fall watching the new Kiffin era at UT with my friends and I'll be starting my new chapter of life with a bang. On that note, I love the fact that Lane Kiffin doesn't give a crap about what any analyst on ESPN or Rivals or whatever says about how he's running his program. We will be a force to be reckoned with in the next few years, mark my words. GO VOLS

ok ok. i'm done ranting on random tangents... To you and yours, have a great holiday weekend. Be Safe, wrap it up, you know about the goldpack right?...


In other news... I AM A WITNESS...

Optimism may be draining but it gets you through the day...

I complained last post about how much being optimistic "without cause" can be such a pain and draining. I know that the outlook on the economy has been dark for a while now. I know that I have been looking for a full-time job since last May and i know plenty of my friends have found jobs since graduation as of late. Maybe I just need to relax and go with the flow. I'm still young and i'll have plenty of time to work in my life(gah, i sound like my father). Life throws you curve balls at every turn. There's no way to predict what is really going to happen. (one reason i hate the idea of a psychic) I've had job opportunities where i've known someone who works for the particular company. I've gotten pretty high on my hopes to get each position only to crash down when I find out that the vice president's 3rd cousin actually gets the position. This is what drains me. I'm positive 85% of the time. I know everything will work out the way it is supposed to. However, I don't understand why it makes sense for me to wait this long. What's wrong with me? Why did some of my friends graduate in December and already have jobs? I have the diploma plus an additional 2 internships worth of experience. Doesn't that make me a better candidate? I sometimes don't understand what hr directors are looking for. I'm not even getting interviews. If I was interviewing for jobs, then it would be different. I'd be ok with the failure because I know they didn't reject me just because of something on a piece of paper. ok, i'm done venting.. for now

Optimism slowly drains you

I can only be positive for so long. With every publication pointing out the obvious dreaded state that we're in, I can't help but slip into a downward spiral towards pessimism.. The front page of the Careers section of my local Paper just flat out said there are no jobs for the 20 somethings b/c the 30 somethings with more experience are taking lower income jobs to stay afloat.. so these 20 somethings (me and my friends) are forced to either a)stay in school by taking out loans and coming out in a few years with more debt than ever (b)move in with the parental units or (c)move over seas to find jobs abroad.. This just blows.. I've been looking for 10 months and all I have to show for it are 2 internships that have not and will not turn into permanent full-time employment. Now yes, it could be a lot worse.. I have no kids, no wife.. no one depending on me to make a living but me... but with the way retirement ages are going up.. i wait any longer and i'll be working until i'm effing 90...I'm just tired of the crap.. ready for the economy to turn around.. and ready for all these bastards in the media explaining how bad it really is, all-day everyday. All you are really doing is scaring people half to death so that the small amount of money they do have.. stays in their pockets thus not stimulating the economy... I'm done venting.. maybe i'll wake up on the right side of the bed tomorrow...

There are things that you learn about yourself on a consistent basis. There are some things that just spring up on you because you been in some sort of cycle of the same crap where you're making the same mistake over and over again. People have a unique way of adapting themselves to any situation. Whether it be finding superhuman strength when you're in a life or death situation, or you're just moving to a new city finding things that you can do for recreation. We change ourselves and the way we interact with things because we have to. I'm learning that i'm consistently changing. I never stay one way or the other. I'm totally becoming fine with it. I'm being myself, and that's all we can as for right? Not if someone else will be themselves, it's if you can be happy with who you really are inside. I'm not saying I think I'm perfect nor am I totally happy with my habits and/or vices. I'm just sayin for the first time, I'm coming to terms with who I am and i'm damn proud of who i'm becoming...

In other news...

HEY! Horny Drunk Guy... STEP AWAY FROM THE GIRL

HEY! You! Yea you! Yea you, drunk ass, salivating over the poor passed out girl. Leave her the hell alone... I don't know if you have low self esteem or a lack of any esteem but you need to understand just because the woman can't give you an audible NO that doesn't give you the right to force yourself upon her.. FUCKFACE, I said step away from the girl....

What the hell is wrong with you people? Now, I may be THE JUST ONE but i'll admit i've had my fair share of horny drunk nights but i've never used that as an excuse to force myself upon a female.. For any MAN who thinks this is an open invite to do as they please is an effing BOY... i'm tired of your dumbass giving a bad name to the entire male species...